I’ve been back in the States just over a week now… I’m happy to report that jet lag didn’t get the best of me this time. I suspect the secret is my rencen wulong tea. Not sure what the caffeine level is in this stuff, but all I know is, I’m up early and I go straight through the day. That’s a good thing, otherwise John would probably feel a tad bitter if I were taking siestas while he was busting ass at work.

So I’ve been pretty productive. The meeting last Thursday with the environmental engineering headhunter went ok. I’m supposed to touch base with him tomorrow to get some interviews set up. After I withdrew my application for the grant writer job at the domestic violence shelter (it was part-time, plus the timing is just too soon), I got an email from the development director this morning. She finished with the second round of interviews and decided none of the other candidates fit the bill, so she’s going to work with a former employee in the interim but she said if, after I got into my job hunt a bit more, I was still interested, I should check back with her to see if the position is still open. Pretty good sign, eh? Made my day. I really got a good vibe from her… it’s too bad the position is only part-time and at nonprofit pay; these days, I’m a self-serving bastard who wants to earn some dough. 🙁 I know, I have a warped view of the world.

On Friday, I got my Office Depot shipment in. John wanted me to have my own workspace in our one bedroom apartment (read: he doesn’t want to share his desk), so I ordered my own desk. You can tell we’re comning up on ten years together, because we’re totally into being on the “same team.” Like we have the same Champion blue mesh shorts (just different sizes, of course). And before, we had the same running shoes. Now, we have the same exact desk– both in the living room. John convinced me to get the hutch also, so we’d only look like half, rather than total, dorks. In usual Office Depot fashion, this desk/hutch combo was a “self-assemble” deal. Jesus Christ. The shipment arrived at 10 am. I finished assembling it all at 9 pm. That thing was a total beotch, man. I am still reeling from having to spend $650 for a desk I have to put together my damn self! The good news is, the desk looks really good. And John was right– I had to get the hutch; otherwise, the look would have been compromised.

So I was feeling very accomplished that night. After all, I had put it together all by myself… well except for getting John to help me lift the hutch onto the desk. We went across the street for dinner at around 10:30. On the way back, I went to fidget with my wedding ring (twist it around my finger), and holy mother of god, the thing was not round. Under the street lamp, I looked down and the thing was totally warped– it was so fucked up, it was the shape of Ohio. I’m talking, not circular, not strongly elliptical, but totally fucked. On top of that, three of the pave diamonds on the band fell out. The damage was so incredible, I was in shock. That shit fucking desk! I was so pissed. Screw the goddamn, good-looking, bullshit desk, you know? I should have taken a picture of the ring, but on arriving home, I immediately started searching ring repair online. I grew increasingly anxious. I mean, here I was still suffering from the sticker shock of living in the Bay area; I was like clipping coupons and turning the thermostat to 82 during the day and hang-drying my clothes (still trying to play my game) and then WHOP! How much was this repair going to cost? Goddamn jewelry. Such a rip-off… the crooks at DeBeers with their blood-sucking, artificially-inflated market. ARGH!!! And yet, this wasn’t just some ring I got at a side stall in China, you know? So despite that crap wedding ring sentimentality, which I despise, I was so angry that I had destroyed something John had worked so hard to give me. Ugh.

So fine, whatever. I started surfing all these like wedding ring forums and shit. And I came across this one lady who was totally hysterical. I should set the record straight though: to my surprise (and to everyone else’s, I’m sure), I didn’t cry. I was just pissed. Pissed that now I would have to get this thing fixed and it was probably going to cost an arm and a leg. So anyway, this lady wrote this post where somehow her ring had gotten damaged, and she apparently “cried and sobbed all day” over it, and she moaned and groaned about how the damage was some kind of insult or blow to their marriage…. you see, that’s when the ring thing has just gone too far. The ring is no longer just a thoughtful, symbolic gift. In her case, the ring IS their marriage. Now, that is messed up… By the way, anyone see Bridezilla? OMG! People spend like $120k on a freakin’ wedding! Seriously, what is wrong with people?!

Back to my Ohio state cookie cutter… After an hour or two of beating myself up about being careless and not removing it before assembling furniture, I got over it. I mean, I could have gotten into some accident where the ring could have cut my finger off (my finger was very bruised— I think I had accidentally set the hutch on my ring/finger but I hadn’t noticed the weight of the furniture because my ring was actually carrying the weight). Or I could’ve gotten hit by a bus and killed (this actually happened to the girlfriend of someone we know). Or seriously, what the hell is going on in Lebanon? People disgust me. And sometimes I disgust myself. So that’s that. I shipped the ring to the manufacturer. They’ll repair it. It’s not the end of the world.

From 2005.07.24

A couple months ago, I refreshed my resume and drafted new cover letters. I sent my vitals out to a variety of employers, mostly nonprofits. These days, my “targets” keep changing… am I really that fickle? You see first, I aimed for nonprofits, especially those working with Chinese women. Then, tech companies drew me in with their young staff, non-existent dress code, and souped up offices… perhaps I could squeeze in as a tech writer, I thought. Then following my semester at Jiao Tong, I felt compelled to apply my Mandarin in a work setting. Unfortunately, that search quickly went dead: employers either want native Mandarin or Mandarin PLUS Cantonese skills. The industries requiring Mandarin/Cantonese don’t even sound very interesting– mainly business or trade or customer service. BOR-RING! So now, I’ve decided to go back to environmental engineering. It’s not that I’m selling out again (as my friend suggested) or anything. The truth is, I’ve always liked environmental engineering in its truest sense– to me, it’s this great combination blending pragmatism, innovation, problem-solving, sustainability, and education. I suppose what disillusioned me years ago was the bureaucracy (and consequently, the turtle’s pace toward trying new things) and well, to a lesser extent, sexism. Anyway, that was four years ago. Thankfully, more people are finally starting to give a shit about environmental stewardship and pollution prevention. Also, companies are changing. Surely even stodgy places are sprucing up their images, right? So environmental engineering might just be a whole new world… we’ll see.

How did environmental engineering even re-enter my brain? In early July, I met up with my former CDM PM in Shanghai. Chris has always been a cool dude; he’s pretty much the antithesis of the stereotypical engineer. Anyway, he’s working on some landfill gas projects in China, and during our meals, I was all excited about getting the industry scoop. Haha, I even remembered some things about landfill gas (I did write a thesis on it)– pretty good considering my last contact with engineering was in 2002. Chris started rattling off some names, and I knew most of them. What a small world, eh? I guess there are only a handful of landfill experts. Needless to say, my meeting with Chris resparked my interest. So now I’m jobhunting again for environmental engineering jobs. The twist, however, to making this experience different than before, is that I’d like to get in on the “soft engineering” side of things. All the hard engineering stuff? Sizing pipes, calculating gas flows, pressures… that doesn’t sound as sweet as it once did. Now I’d like to try my hand at marketing… like writing project proposals. I think that could be a really good fit since I have the tech background and I want to develop this whole persuasive writing skill… Imagine the things I could do with that.

So this past Tuesday, I hopped right into the pool with a job interview for a part-time grant writer position. I met with the development director for a nearby domestic violence organization. The director was super cool, and I think I would learn tons about fundraising, grantwriting, the art of pitching… I was really pleased too, because she wanted to put me on the shortlist– in with the final runners– if I was really interested. So the downside, of course, is timing, pay, and benefits. Fortunuately, she understands that what they can offer is limited. The position is only 15 hours/week with NO benefits. And pay is $18-25/hr, with the upper limit of course going to someone with actual grantwriting experience. So, not so great. The plus side is that I’m always a softie for nonprofits– more so for orgs focused on women. The staff is also really diverse and multicultural, PLUS the office is dog-friendly. Dayum!! Ah but age has turned me into a greedy beotch. I want it all: challenging and meaningful content, progressive co-workers, a nice office with kickass resources (that’s what happens when your hubby is a tech nerd), AND high pay (or at least higher pay). Sorry, but I just don’t want to be a 30-something earning $35k/year in an area where a 3-bedroom townhouse costs $900k! Know what I mean?

ANYway, tomorrow I’m meeting with an environmental engineering headhunter. Honestly, I didn’t even know those existed! Silly me though: I threw all my suits in with our ocean freight. Guess slacks and a top will have to do. I’m such a retard.

In other job-related news, I started reading John’s book, 12 Bad Habits that Hold Good People Back. Apparently, the authors are Ph.D. psychologists at Harvard or whatever. The text is surprisingly readable and insightful. Unfortunately, I think I possess like 4 of the 12 bad habits! Yeah, I’m bad news. Great start, I tell you.

Oh, I meant to share this earlier… like right when I left my beloved Shanghai. Sorry it’s out of sequence: We left paradise for the suburbs
Regardless, my man Cary is brilliant! How does he know just what to say and just how to say it? Admittedly, I don’t agree with EVERYTHING he advises (what, you think I just follow him blindly??), but still, when he’s right, he’s right.

Btw, I should state that I HATE driving. I’ve already had like three close calls in three days. I never thought I’d admit to this, but I’m a terrible driver. Pre-China, I was passable. No major accidents, a little heavy in the foot. Now? I dunno if it’s my new immigrant status or what. I’m like looking at all the street signs, hoping they’ll be like the ones in Shanghai, with north, south, east, west markings. Nope. Plus in California, the damn lanes are misaligned. Like if you keep the wheel straight and drive through the intersection, suddenly you’re in the far right lane whereas before the intersection, you were in the middle lane. Drives me crazy. I gotta order Furby junior soon. Can’t deal with the car. Need my ebike back. I’m all disoriented.

Sorry for the recent inactivity; despite the quiet on Goodbers, my life has been anything but. Shit man, moving is a bitch! I dunno why we keep getting the relocation bug every two frickin’ years. It’s such a damn inconvenience, I tell you. The packers came July 4, packed all our junk. Original estimated volume was less than three cubic meters. Actual? FIVE. To be fair, we threw in my oversized guzheng (Chinese zither) as well as John’s 23-inch Apple cinema display (which will appear on Ebay next month…). The rest was mostly books— and clothing (can’t chuck winter clothes since I’ll likely visit DC in the winter). We’re low maintenance, really we are!!? No knick knacks, no trinkets, no baubles. Nonetheless, our shipment is gonna give us a nightmare on the other side… in our one bedroom apartment that already has two dogs and two adults and basic furniture. Upgrading to a two bedroom might actually be in order… Ugh, can’t think about it now. Too stressful. So anyway, packers came but that wasn’t even the worst of it. Then, we began the process of emptying out the apartment. I’m just shaking my head, man. The kitchen? Spices, canned foods, dried goods, enough food to feed a village. Then all this stationery crap like pencil lead, erasers, rubber bands. Then household products: bug spray, mosquito coils, cleaning agents… So much goddamn crap. This is why I want to live in a tree. All this frickin’ clutter drives me nuts. And then of course, I was obsessing about “proper” disposal or reuse. In the end, it was still a mad dash to the finish. Thankfully, Wu cleaned us out. Literally. She took TONS of stuff; I really wonder how it will all fit in her place but maybe she plans to upgrade. I dunno. Oh well, I’ve washed my hands so it’s all good for me.

I’m cleaning out my hard drive today (September 21, 2006), and guess what I find? An old entry, which I don’t think ever got posted (blogger connection problems). So here it is, going back to July 14…

Between cleaning and in John’s case, working, we managed to squeeze in several gorge-fests. We finally went to City Diner. My friend Joon’s been raving about that place for months. Thankfully, I didn’t try it sooner; I’d easily be 20 lbs. heavier. That shit beats good old American diner food in the States. God, the BLT… I’m salivating just thinking about it. Also, we hit Di Shui Dong (滴水洞), a Hunan place. Yeah, all the sudden I’m all into hot and spicy. We’re addicts. Yes, hit that place at least FOUR times in the last two weeks-— braved the bathroom consequences and all. I should insert a funny story here.

On one of those nights, a waitress came up to us near the end of dinner. She asked if we were there earlier that week. Yeah, we’re regulars. Then, she asked if we sat on the other side of the room. I started to realize she wasn’t just commenting on our frequent patronage… Apparently, the other night she got the checks between two tables mixed up, and one party got a steal, paying 89 rmb less than the value of their order. Poor girl realized the mistake only afterwards, so she had to foot the difference.

I insisted that I sat at a table on the other side but not the one she pointed. I also explained our bills NEVER come under 200 rmb. I could see in her eyes that she didn’t believe me. But what else could she do? All she could do was show me the order ticket (it had other items we didn’t order) and take my word for it. But I still felt bad about it. I didn’t want her to feel like I was lying. So what did I do? 发票 to the rescue, man. I’m telling you, my receipts game SAVED me. I dug up my receipts from the last week, found the ones with their company chop/number, and showed it to her: 210 in receipts from the other day. Aw yeah baby! It was a fine redeeming moment. Haha!

In China, at one time or another, you learn to work the system. My Chinese friend 毛毛 (Mao Mao) recently switched jobs. As a 外地人 (migrant), changing jobs is no walk in the park; unless you’re Shanghainese, you get screwed with loads of extra paperwork just so you can work legally in the city. Labor permits, work visas, annual health checks… a total pain in the ass, not to mention a time sink AND a money pit. I went through the tiresome process myself a couple times, so I empathize with Mao, who is both low on time and low on cash. Needless to say, she was over one night, and my scanner caught her eye. I’ve done a couple websites and shit, but I’m certainly no graphic artist or “documents expert.” Ah well, I will say this: her new employer received all the photocopies she requested of Mao’s materials. Am I a good Samaritan slash bad ass or what?

I should have known better… One week later and I still have Sandy. First, she was in the middle of finals. After exams were over, I texted her asking if she was still interested. No pressure: this was her out. And she said she was still interested. Over the next two days, I gave her time slots for her to swing by. First, she wasn’t feeling well– would come by the next day. Then, the next day, still wasn’t feeling well. Would just text me when she was ready to come by. Meanwhile, I’m up to my fucking ears in last minute bullshit. And then I’ve got SCAA asking what is up with Nemesis and telling me Sandy’s due for more jabs plus spaying. Jesus Christ. I dunno how I get myself into these things. The plan was so simple and fuckhead nemesis screwed me over. Hate her. Why did I even give her two seconds of reconsideration?

So things are fine. Someone’s coming to purchase and haul off the dresser, DVD player, lamp, electric toothbrush, etc. I’m whittling things down. Also, my friend Susie is going to bring her dog over to check out Sandy. If those two get along, Susie may be up for fostering Sandy. Thank goodness. A more reliable option. It’s really a shame Sandy has grown into such a complicated situation, because she is so damn easy. Seriously. You cannot get an easier dog than this. Oh well, idiots are not my problem anymore.

Btw, I’m FINALLY getting my Enjoy Shanghai voucher today. That was another mess of its own but looks like the conclusion is near. Man, Shanghai is fucking muggy outside. It’s depressing me. Actually, this whole move/new life thing is depressing me. A bit. I mean, I’m happy about being with Bubbey again but things are really weird with this whole starting over thing. And it’s our final week in China and I don’t feel like doing anything.

Gotta give it to Air China for making our last SFO PVG trip a memorable one. Yes, I have written many a posts bitching about the disastrous state of “customer service.” To date, I have sworn off HP laptops, Best Buy, China Eastern (through LAX), Sprint, Enjoy Shanghai… yes, the list goes on. Everywhere I turn, I am disappointed with half-ass people. Seriously, how are these people even employed? Anyway, in case you were wondering, something actually came from the Enjoy debacle: I was offered a voucher to SF Steakhouse in town (yes, how appropriate). Trouble is, it’s now been two weeks and I have yet to receive the voucher in the mail. I actually had trouble receiving mail from Enjoy in the past. Initially, it was my bad: I miswrote my address as Number 5 rather than Lane 5. But I corrected the mistake last year. Now, it’s the same problem again. Now Enjoy is like investigating something with the post office. Must everything be so goddamn difficult? Jesus fucking Christ.

So the whole thing with Air China… first, John and I are fying back to SF on separate airlines. He’ll be on United; I’ll be on Air China. And the official airline of the Beijing Olympics has me fucking going through BJ. So bloody stupid. When I purchased the ticket last October, the flight was direct. Then in April, Air China made the brilliant decision to alter the route with a stopover in BJ– only adds about 4 hours’ time to the itinerary. Fuckers. I spent days on the phone with Travelocity (they’re on my shitlist now too) AND Air China and ultimately, I got no where. Pissed me off. So I guess John and I can consider this flight back a safe strategy, like for the kids we don’t have. You know, in case one of us goes down, at least the other survives for the nonexistent kiddies. Morbid but hey, people actually think like that!

John’s experience with Air China last Saturday was hell. In BJ, the connecting flight to SH never made it, so the agents scrambled for an alternative. After utter disorder and chaos, the passengers were hurried from one end of the BJ airport to the other to board a plane headed for Hongqiao airport (rather than Pudong). Fortunately, Hongqiao is closer to our apartment, but still. The two SH airports are on the opposite sides of town! Had it not been for John’s smartphone, I would have been waiting at PVG for no reason.

In light of our recent bad experiences with the airlines, it’s a wonder I’m giving an iota of thought to some job openings with Cathy Pacific in their San Francisco base. You see, I’m kinda bummed about leaving China. My good friend Jenny, a former Cathay Pacific flight attendant, told me Cathay is aiming to open shop in SF. They are currently recruiting billingual staff for their SFO-HKK route. I’m actually a bit surprised by my interest in this opportunity. After all, am I cool and glamorous and wild and crazy (that’s how I imagine airline crews…)? Not a bit. Still, I’ll look into it. My friends are skeptical too: they can’t see me excelling at customer service, or rather, they can’t see me putting up with other people’s bullshit… Oh well, this could just be my ticket to Asia. Plus, it’s a job where I can use my Mandarin so can’t be that bad, right? More on that later.

In other news, the last few days have been exhausting. John and I braved the suffocating heat and headed out to Pudong to extend his visa on Monday. I don’t care what I told you during the winter: Shanghai summers are definitely WORSE than Shanghai winters. Just to put it in perspective, my buddy Pamela canceled shopping because of the heat. You know it’s REALLY bad then!

So yesterday, the packers finally came. Jesus. I only wasted like two weeks trying to squeeze a goddamn quote out of these people. So confusing. There’s like the main shipping company that has an agent in Shanghai and then I also deal with another dude in their SFO branch office. Oddly, they don’t communicate directly. They actually go through me… bizarro. Then, there’s this separate packing company that’s supposed to get me cleared through customs in China. That company has like three different contacts, and every time we talk money, they ask me what price I was quoted. Yeah, totally sketch. Like I’m getting a laowai quote or something. So frustrating dealing with all these hands in the pot. So we ended up shipping back a few unanticipated things– his 23-inch cinema display which didn’t sell and my guzheng (which, encased, is practically the size of a coffin!). What we had expected to be under 3 cubic meters ended up being 5! And we’re supposed to be minimalists. I was so depressed yesterday after they hauled off our 20 big-ass boxes. How did this happen? Damn books, I tell you. We don’t even have knicky-knacky shit. It was like four monster tubs of books plus clothes and bedding. Anyway, I’m disgusted with myself. It definitely isn’t going to be pretty on the other side. I just hope my oil paintings, guzheng, and cinema display arrive unscathed.

I’ve been away from the gym for about five days. Yeah, the food safari has already taken its toll… But it rained this evening so things have cooled off some. I plan to head over around 9. Gotta get in my 30 minutes of misery.

Btw, Nemesis is coming over tomorrow to check out Sandy. We’ll see what comes of that. I also sold my dresser and a radiator heater… Hurray! Checkin’ shit off the list… We’re down to the homestretch.