God, sometimes people really are just clueless. A good friend of mine was in town last weekend. She and her dude are moving to SF next month. I’m thrilled, but this last visit just really rubbed me the wrong way. I mean, aside from not being very organized about their schedule and how it affected us (for example, airport pickup/dropoff, overnight stays, city events), I was really disappointed by their general lack of common courtesy. There was no sense that crashing at our place caused any bit of inconvenience. Everything was just whatever: “Grabbing dinner” while they were in town searching for an apartment turned into can you pick us up. Then, can you DVR something. Then, can we stay the first night. Then, we might stay the last night. Then, can we get a ride to the airport.
I mean, hello, some level of prep (for John and me) is involved when people stay over: cleaning, washing, laundry, rolling out the bed, sheets, towels, etc. Flying by the seat of the pants is fine for people who are totally self-sufficient, but hey, it’s our time too. It’s fine to ask for an airport pickup, but what’s the flight info? It’s not ok to just tell me to pick up at 7:30. What if the flight is late? Duh.
And if staying with us, which days exactly? Since there was two of them, I set everything up in the office so they didn’t have to sleep on the living room couch. That meant that I pulled out the memory foam mattress and plopped it right in the middle of our office. Set out clean sheets, pillowcases, blankets, towels. It’s not as if they brought sleeping bags… The point is, the stay over itself is not a big deal. We’re all friends, so it’s fine. But what’s the schedule? Am I supposed to just have the mattress sitting there in the middle of the office waiting in case they do decide to come back?
In the end, they did return and then wanted a ride the next afternoon to the airport. John stuck around the house and made breakfast. They lounged about in a daze all morning. When he dropped them off, it was just “bye.” No “thank you for letting us stay, thank you for breakfast, thank you for shuttling us around.” And the kicker?
When I got home, all the stuff was still everywhere– the towels hung on chairs, sheets, blankets left as is, all as if the heat had come around the corner, and they just got up and left. We’re not a fucking hotel, you know? In the very least they could have folded everything up or put it in a pile or offered to help clean up. It wasn’t even like they were in a hurry that morning and wanted to clean up but didn’t have time.
When other friends of mine visited last month, the day they left, the office was clean: sheets, towels, blankets, pillowcases– all of it was taken apart and folded in a pile. Memory foam was rolled up and put to the side. Common courtesy. I mean leaving everything strewn around…. that’s how my brother would behave if he were visiting. Totally inconsiderate and clueless. And the problem isn’t simply me being my Type A self here. Even Bubs commented (before I even said anything)! People are disappointing.