I’ve gone through a lot of jobs, so in many ways, I consider myself an expert in workplace assessments. Hee, hee. You see, I’ve developed a mental checklist. My hypothesis is that I can determine the compatibility of a new job fairly quickly (say, within one week) based on just a few key items:

Prior to the start date
1. Is the job description and benefits information comprehensive and organized? Is HR knowledgeable?
2. Do the decision makers listen to my requests? Do they attempt to accommodate my concerns?

On the first day
3. Is my desk set up? Do they hook me up with supplies? Are the file drawers empty of other people’s crap?
3. Is my computer set up? Does it have the basic productivity software? Is my email account ready? Is my Dreamweaver/Adobe/MS software an acceptable version (i.e., within the last year or two)?
4. Are there orientation materials?
5. Do I get introduced to everyone?
6. Do they take me out to lunch?
7. Do I get the key/badge/timecard?
8. Do I get QT with my boss?
9. Does my phone work?

These are just some of the basic questions that run through my head in the beginning. And they sound pretty simple, but you would be amazed how many places don’t have this shit down on Day 1. Seriously. And maybe you think this is a silly list. That the items are frivolous. I argue otherwise: it’s all in the details. These are all clues.

And I gotta say, my newest place is doing well. They even bought me the latest version of Dreamweaver. Totally exceeded my expectation– how cool is that? And the HR/orientation stuff is so organized. Professional binders, printed dividers, the works. I’m impressed. Good sign.

My boss wasn’t able to take me out to lunch my first day, but he came and told me why. And another team person took me out. See? Classy. My boss seems pretty cool. Friendly, approachable, easy-going. Still, I know it’s early.

So the thing is, well, last night, I came across an interesting page. And now I’m all weirded out. I know, people say personal life is personal life, but to be honest, I don’t really believe that. I feel that people should be accountable for all actions, and all of it ties together. I didn’t buy the personal/professional segmentation for ex-Pres Clinton, and I’m inclined to react similarly here. Sure, I don’t have the full story, but you already know I have issues. I’ve admitted that I’m a prude about the whole concept of casual sex. Yes, when both parties consent, I know it’s their choice, blah, blah. In this case though, the two parties are on different pages. And there’s all this infidelity and deception. Huge hot buttons. And so, I can’t help but feel icky. I mean, if all is true, a jerk is a jerk, right? You can’t be a jerk at home and a sincere person at work, can you? Fuck. I don’t know. I mean, I think about who I am at work and who I am at home. Yes, I cuss like a sailor at home and with friends. And I throw a massive temper tantrum/cussfest when my parents/brother piss the crap out of me… does that mean I’m also guilty of duplicity? I don’t know. I just feel like honesty is really important–probably most important in your personal relationships. And if your partner can’t/shouldn’t trust you, how can other people? Sigh. It’s late now, and I’m getting delirious. Need to sleep on this. I think I’m going to have a problem with the icky feeling. I was on an early roll. Too good to be true?