So, freaky guy emailed me Friday. He said the USEPA Pacific region is hiring, and he has a contact. I know they’re hiring, and actually, I have a contact… Anyway, his message began innocently enough; the following sentence, however, was a bit weird. Here’s what he wrote:

Read the Chronicle Classified there are jobs with the EPA. Call me let’s do lunch and I’ll show you how to get into show business.

Ok, wtf? Show business? Is that a typo, because I have never ever mentioned anything about getting into the entertaiment/media industry. John says “show business” raises a red flag and that kind of lingo is commonly used to get some ass. Again, I’m feeling an odd mix of emotions. First, I’m confused. Where is this coming from? The jump from EPA work to show business just doesn’t flow. Second, if the statement does not in fact contain a typo, I’m pissed. I mean, who does he think he is? As if I’m going to fall for some desperate shit like that? I have never been one for random hook ups or one-night stands or sex buddy arrangements. Call me conservative. Call me insecure. Call me closed-minded. Whatever. With that kind of activity, I’m fine being labeled “conservative” and “UNliberated.” Third, I’m a bit curious. Is this dude for real? I almost want to test him, to figure this out, because if he is seriously propositioning me in any kind of inappropriate way, I want to clear all doubt and then go in for the kill. You know? Like, just try me, and I will give you a piece of my mind. Bring it.